Who or What to avoid Online

Dating virtually or dating in the day to day world is a daunting task. There are hurdles to overcome, frogs to kiss, stalkers to avoid and all sorts of other perils. In a face to face situation, you are often able to read a person’s emotions or actions in a way that lets you see the danger signs before going over the cliff.

How do you apply those same markers to an online dating situation?  Here are just a few pointers and red flags to keep in mind, while you comb the dating sites.

Remember: Nobody is Perfect

Nobody is perfect.  Chances are if you have found a member that is a perfect fashion model, with a soaring IQ and a Nobel Peace prize, then they are not representing themselves accurately. While there is undoubtedly someone out there who is perfect for you, the probability of that someone being the perfect ideal for everyone is pretty small.

If they are lying about their identity, they could either be a prankster or a potential stalker.  In very few cases, would someone who does not intend harm in some way, pull a stunt like this.  Beware and if it is an option, report this person for review by the site administrator.

Less is more

Way too much skin and very little face.  So you are looking at a profile picture of a body that would look good in anything, unfortunately they aren’t wearing anything. While everyone should be comfortable in their own skin, nobody should show so much of it that they look like they are posing for a swimsuit magazine instead of looking for a life partner.

This person is once again trying to be dishonest; whether that is hiding from a current partner by not showing their face, or by not being the person in the picture in the first place. Also, anyone who has an excess of near-naked pictures of themselves should be a major red flag.  More than likely you are heading into a self-esteem whirlpool, don’t get sucked into it.

Listen to your instincts

The mimic is out there lurking.  This person tends to be whoever you want them to be.  Want an easy going and care free relationship, they are up for that.  Want something more serious and life long, they can do that.  These people are the modern day equivalent of snake oil salesmen.

They will tell you exactly what you want to hear and have no feelings of remorse when you find out about it.  Two types of people fall into this category, either the well meaning desperate person or the intentionally manipulative and potentially dangerous.  Regardless, of which one they are, stay away.  Walk don’t run, delete don’t save.

But Online Dating is Rewarding

Online dating can be a rewarding and enjoyable experience, especially in today’s fast paced, energy draining world.  But don’t fall into the misconception that just because it is convenient means it is easier or, for that matter, safer.

You still need to realize that undesirables are in every bar and on every site.  It is up to you stay aware and informed on what could be out there.  Be safe, have fun and if you see a red flag do not  ignore it.


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